Friday 27 June 2014

d100 Pubs on Planet Psychon

Pubs in every citadel trade quarter at least. In wilds many are trading posts and whore houses and general stores. Pubs on the highways, ports, and trade routes connecting every drunk to the world wide web of vice and cheap thrills. Well that's the dream anyway. Many village size community has one.

Several approaches here:

Take a band from 70s or 80s look and album covers and that's your bar. Plus more freaks.

or start your dice...

roll 1d4 stars for quality for venue over all or for very service separately

village pub 1d3-1 roll on each
town pub 1d3 rolls on each
city bar 1d4 rolls of each

d12 Special Entertainment
1 Incredibly attractive staff
2 Exotic dancers of many flavours, special review show of stripper circus freaks and beast men
3 Stage with open mike, free drinks to player if they keep a crowd, possibly a karaoke-borg
4 Philosophical debate where local philosophers discuss some amazing issue
5 Games night d4 1=3D Chess 2=Cards 3=Russian roulette 4=video game
6 Video feed or drive in d6 1=ancients 2=cult 3=a citadel 4=space 5=underground 6=dimension x
7 Animal night byo pet d4 1=fighting 2=racing 3=cooking 4= 5=dogs 6=mutant homunculus
8 Fighting d4 1=nightly patron brawls 2=press gang 3=men's 4=women's 5=dueling 6=wrestling
9 skill Contests d6 1=target 2=muscle 3=eat 4=drink 5=picking random numbers 6=music
10 Magician d4 1=illusions 2=gothic 3=flashy 4=mentalist
11 Sing along and dancing with house band a party of adventurers, possibly cool jerks
12 Celebrity d6 1=ex courtier 2=artist 3=adventurer 4=sage or scholar 5=criminal 6=harlot/rake

12 dining experiences
1 Fabulous ration pack of the ancients UN food aid
2 Delightful gruel been cooking away fer three generations
3 Bunker burger and rabble rat-dogs with rubble runner dinner deals for kids
4 Soylent green bread or pasta or noodles from our own kitchen, come see for yourself
5 Sausage and mash and gravy d4 1=recycled human waste 2=animal 3=only a bit human 4=soyadog
6 Pizza from 3d food printer to best from mutant town with sausage, many kinds
7 Preserved treats from ancients d4 1=medical museum 2=canned 3=grandmas pickles 4=salted
8 Insect protein biscuit or algae-bar or mushroom burger
9 Specialty of the house pie
10 Mystery kill of the day
11 Bizarre local specialty
12 Variety menu try to please all

drinking experiences
1 Local beer
2 Juice bar
3 Cafe
4 Cocktail bar
5 Milk bar
6 Soup bar
7 Ambrosia from d4 1=insects milk 2=rare fruits 3=gods 4=from a creature plumbed into bar
8 Teahouse
9 Fermented milk or yogurt
10 Wine bar
11 Distilled fuel grade grog
12 Drink replicator or vending machine

Other services

1 Travel agent
2 Job service
3 Black Market
4 Weapons and armour
5 Supplies
6 Stables and livestock
7 School for fighting or other lore
8 Slaves
9 Prostitutes
10 Healing
11 Fortune teller
12 Inn

dodgy experiences
1 Thieves try and rob you in person or rooms
2 Appealing prostitute d6 1=crazy person 2=robber 3=date n drug 4=cultist 5=spy 6=plague
3 Parasitic infection of some horrible sort
4 Mind controlled or duplicated or mistaken identity
5 Offered dodgy deal for the common man
6  Offered secret plans or maps
7 Stalked by pervert
8 Surrounded by cultists
9 Pressgang kidnap you
10 Brawl breaks out
11 Someone following you d4 1=Bounty hunter 2=assassin 3=lover 4=
12 Someone killed with d4 1=strange powers 2=ancient tech 3=monster 4=shape shifter

d100
1 Live pornographic theater restaurant with a olden days theme
2 Automated takeaway franchise served by androids improvising with ingredients
3 A bar crawling with dungeon miscreants having a break from eating adventurers
4 A bar with cyborg and mutant bounty hunters waiting for next job
5 A bar with silent patrons who stare at strangers, actually are all pod plant people
6 A pub frequented by shapshifters who prey on newcomers for fun
7 Barman reputed to have amazing kitchen actually a starship food printer
8 A goblinoids pub with mostly smaller kobolds and goblins, dark and cramped
9 Odd replicant family 9 operate and are replaced every 4 years by distant AI with vat
10 Octopoids run bar with exotic dancing eldren, descendants of a crashed starship crew
11 Pub has creepy arms and drug dealers and mercenaries openly showing merchandise
12 Bar full of amphibian beastmen abhumans offering strange but popular fermented invertebrates
13 Fruity drinks served by friendly beastmen with house band playing 80s electro pop
14 Bar with many robots and androids heavily into death metal and down on humans
15 Punk rock wastelandrs with everything salvaged from vehicle wrecks, robot cook
16 Bedazzled with LED gems gang of cowboys run bar as cover for brutal crimes
17 Goth necromancr bar low low prices due to staff being undead
18 Anti gravity bar served by gaseous life form with food replicator and octopus band
19 Intelligent animals gather here to discuss if humanity must be destroyed or worked with
20 Grey aliens serving unpleasant dishes from home, grey and white paste, maggots, odd fluids, etc
21 Hopeless and pathetic mutants try best to please customers, clumsy and bits of them drop off
22 Cult of the blood god operate this place to murder everyone they get the chance too
23 Inside a giant snail shell, a caterpillar bartender with racks of strange herbs and hookas
24 Pleasure androids in a semi buried cargo transport hold operate bar bed breakfast and brothel
25 Organic alien spoor grew and was enslaved by locals to produce food and grog, bar inside it
26 Inside a huge tree with furry critters, little hairy folk and eldren with unicorn beastman barkeep
27 A pink and blue sweet and cake theme bar with everything sweet run by madman and munchkins
28 Barkeep is psionic and predicts your drink orders, offers to buy and sell dreams as drinks
29 Vampires run clean but dark bar and tolerate others if obey, can pay fees in gold or blood
30 This bar has genetically modified cow beast women with amphetamine milk shakes
31 Mean children run this bar and sneer at the feeble adults addicted to local potions
32 A mutant has dreamed all his life of opening a bar, luckily his family are competent and help him
33 Old Dame runs this according to complex codes of ancient manners but high quality posh joint
34 Androids from ancient theme park run and perform while guests eat, terribly kitch
35 Great stone cave with reptile man barkeep amid skeletal remains of giant dinosaurs
36 Caveman bar drinking out of hollow log with fermented berries and honey and shrooms
37 Former bloodthirsty temple to alien god, now operating as a local tavern, great theme decor
38 Crystal cave with psionic sentient crystal pillars, will beverages and comforts into being
39 Ice cave bar with intelligent penguins, wendigo, mammoth beast men and cavemen
40 Traveling freak show broke down and set up this bar of fraks from far flung places
41 Fleshy glowing cavern with golden barkeeps who serve the great eye of the biological starship
42 Baroque palace with effete dandies sneering at riff raff aloud in here, all killer duelists
43 Built over crater with bar part of crashed alien cylinder, owner is a octopoid retired soldier
44 Ruined hole operated by crazy old monk, tries to seduce women with psionics
45 Bunker foyer littered with artifacts of ancients on display turned into a theme tavern
46 Ancient bar where cultists serve you while reciting deeds of mighty celebrities of the ancients
47 Psychedelic bar with weird light shows, lava lamps, drugs and mostly mellow crowd
48 Wild west saloon theme bar with android gunfighter who kills anyone with a big ego
49 Former corporate bunker, manager keeps secret hidden tribe of corporate goon clones in vault
50 Fake beach resort with meat on grill, friendly slaves and breadfruit, no canibalism here for years
51 Run by family of giant crabs, limpid rock pools with sea creatures scattered around grotto
52 Bugbear gangsters run this bootleg moonshine bar and organise crimes dressed in pin strip suits
53 Strange silent glitter skinned men in bowler hats run, occasionally giant fly buzzes around bar
54 Cat men and human-cat wannabees serve, all floors and surfaces carpeted, customers sit in boxes
55 Jolly Pig men wallow in pits of rotten food, garbage and mud, get young piglet followers here
56 Vegetarian alcohol free health bar run by naked cultists, shrooms and bongs are free
57 Appears as humble inn with good restaurant, actually all staff are assassins in training
58 Morlocks run bar and have some fresh and frozen eloi for the right price, tempted by eldren guests
59 Eldren tavern where all service painfully slow and ritualized but high quality
60 A dark cellar where beastmen bands play around the clock rock for "cavern creeps"
61 Haunted house theme managed by freaks, monsters and golem house servants
62 Creepy overly sexualized bar with gimps, glory holes and tired sex workers of every persuation
63 A boiler room of ancients clad in riveted metal, live butchery of any ordered meals or non payers
64 A angelic eldren maiden sleeps in crystal sarcophagi, now used as novelty saloon bar counter
65 Local bar for local people - will dream up 1d4+1 prejudices on the spot to exclude your party
66 Bubbling geothermal heated grotto with healing spring, prostitutes and strange exotic drinks
67 Tavern run by witches with potions and other services, curse or transform any rude guests
68 Orc bar with stone furniture, touchy beserk chef, serve prunes, dates, grubs, roots, meat and nuts
69 Friendly commoner bar with monsters in cages who's eggs are served as house dishes
70 Gambling mad bar with complementary mini sausages, spring rolls and cheap watery beer
71 Coffee bar where beatniks and mutants and punks perform poetry of varying standards
72 Comfy cheap quality inn but all night clog dancing gets a bit annoying
73 Run down bar full of drug addicts, plague carriers, broken needles and trash and corpses on floor
74 Rat men tavern surprisingly cleaner than you would expect, treading on patron tails starts fights
75 Gear head bar with morlocks and techies half finished machines and cogs everywhere
76 Sport bar, guests must compete in local games to be able to stay
77 Mushroom men bar, gloomy dark earthy pit with glowing fungi, mushroom burgers are fabulous
78 State run clean restaurant and rooms, serve recycled corpses and effluent for guests from locals
79 Gold chain wearing gang serve traditional ghetto meals, outraged will attack any disrespect
80 Bar where colourful costumed vigilante gang and comic book cult operate
81 Sombre grisly cold gulag themed inn with guards, razor wire, herring-barley gruel and vodka
82 Ancient confused patriot cult worship a pre apocalypse faction, with theme drinks, food and music
83 Bar overcrowded with homeless and refugees, serves soup and floorspace to sleep, full of thieves
84 Vintage hotel staffed by winged monkeys in bellhop outfits, very posh and baroque
85 Shabby dirty stone hut with beer served in horns and a spit roast every night no women
86 Hall with weapons and paintings of war on walls, staffed by amazons, men sleep in barn only
87 Strange bar with sultry costumed freaks, serve gender changing drinks and aphrodisiacs
88 Bar in cave with patrons dining and drinking amid coils of crystal dragon, lizard men serve
89 Organic bar with macroscopic entities serving food and drink from their orifices, locals dont mind
90 Bee men hive makes extra cash, serve honey and royal jelly and mead, waxy sleeping cells
91 Bar with crystalline furnishings, strange auroras and served by sentient shades of colour
92 Metal chimes and tetrahedrons furnished bar, eerie otherworldly sounds and free drugs
93 Ancient machine serves food and drink if you solve logic puzzles and answer personality tests
94 Gelatinous repulsive tentacled aliens try best to make things humans might like and make friends
95 Bar in huge cage full of millions of butterflies and flowers tended by eldren serving tea
96 Ancient inn served by ghosts who act like nothing is wrong and locals fine with that
97 Fleshy chamber with writhing mass of tentacles dribbling nutritious narcotic slime, all for free
98 Goblinoid run as bar and job centre for dungeon monsters with training centre
99 Huge fleshy mammalian creature with millions of breasts allows guests to feed and sleep
100 roll twice and combine results

2 comments:

  1. Wow there is a whole lot of crazy in those tables.A couple of those rolls would definetly turn some folks away from booze.

    Thereks no entry 7 in dinning experiences may I suggest a variety of pickled treats in jars? Typical fare like pickled eggs, pickled pig feet, pickled weiners, and pickled punks.

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