Saturday, 28 December 2024

A d20 funny things happened on the way to the Ressurectionist

Oh no you've got to get a corpse of a pal to a magic person to zap them back to life. So you must roll this table a few times on the way.

Build an adventure on the fly with a few of these when rushing to a temple or a campaign to bury a mentor or saint in a distant tomb and then do lots of these.

The more times you raise dead the more stuff happens.

Weekend at Burnies meets Three Stooges + your fantasy setting. Watch some silent slapstick of the UK short film The Plank when preparing an adventure with these.

Spiritual Parasites
Spiritual parasites hang around in dungeons as a curse and cling to people who fail a save. There are no obvious effects on the living.

Benevolent spirits - occupy the body the keep evil ones out, if under spiritual attack the body will loudly sing hymns of praise to the gods. Such spirits might be found in a good shrine and locals will leave spirits overnight before burial here.

d20 Funny things happened on the way to the Resurrectionist
Maggots! - the curse of the worm god upon ye for denying worms their due d6 1=rotgrubs attracted to the corpse 2=green glowing grubs carry the curse of undeath to corpses 3=larvae hatches from within with face of the character and will attract evil planar beings like imps and hags 4=carrion worms smell the body and want it, they seem to cooperate but its quite mindless 5=giant flies want it to lay eggs on or near the body 6=a fly demon from the Abyss
Family - show up rather fast somehow like they knew and claim the body. Would prefer they be cremated and placed in a family crypt safely. The clan agents and family are willing to wage all-out war to get the embarrassing body. They may use wealth to put out wanted posters of party or set the law on anyone. If not rich enough a crime gang steps in to help
3 Body Trauma - an underworld trickster spirit has taken notice of the dead d4 1=bizarre accident chops the body into a d4 portions 2=sets in rigour mortis in bizarre inconvenient pose terrific expression, occasionally spasms 3=constant stinking flatulence and diarrhoea leakage 4=swarm of parasites or a baby horror evacuate the body making it spasm and messy
4 Tax Collector - here to claim death taxes and go through all the dead person's belongings for an audit a standard tactic with adventures. Anyone in their way may need an audit too. You will see them coming and glancing at you with their halberdier veterans
5 Cult - need a specific body fast for their disembodied master to occupy to enter this world, blame some birthmark, curse of family legacy

6 Witches - appear to warn you of the world-shaking consequences of restoring your friend but can't give details just weird poems open to wild interpretation
Religious Zealots  - who wildly react to meeting travellers with a corpse in the incorrect manner of heretic or enemy religion d4 1=riot 2=demand to perform the correct on the rites 3=meeting a corpse on the road fulfils a prophecy and they need the corpse now! 4=offer to cast speak with dead to confirm party story they are friends of the deceased
8 The Law - local law wonders what going on here d4 1=law needs proof of what you say and wants to lock you up and take the corpse until your identity is confirmed 2=carrying a corpse on the king road without a permit is a fine 3=law demand a bribe to let you go or will come up with problems 4=army using crown authority need you to assist them in an urgent crisis now
9 Disaster - terrible disaster imperils innocents in need of aid and makes travel harder d4 1=flash flood washes away bridges or ferries 2=earthquake then avalanche blocks roads 3=fire! forest ablaze and houses in danger 4=plague of vermin with dangerous swarms harming people and animals and damaging properties
10 Hungry Beast - can smell a delicious high adventurer corpse to eat full of magical power it needs to reach its next power up. Maybe several specimens competing d4 1=draconic beast 2=ogre magi 3=chimera 4=manticore
11 The Wild Hunt - for some reason, the forest hunter seeks the body d4 1=was promised by a parent of the green god 2=goddess demand the body in her presence 3=promises to revive dead in magic cauldron if party a quest in the otherworld 4=flesh and heart of a fallen hero are required to feed baby unicorns to purify the forest
12 The Evil One - sends some sinister knights to steal the body, if killed the master raises them as wight knights to try again, repeating as often as needed 
13 Planer Peril - intruding planar powers bring curious creatures into this world who are interested in that body d4 1=faerie 2=devils 3=demons 4=elementals 
14 Parasite Spirit - has been inside the body for some time growing and maturing and the death of the host makes it pupate early into our world as an invisible dimensional horror
15 Wicked Spirit - a spiritual parasite lurking around the host for a while and has been waiting. It highjacks the corpse, it is intelligent and malicious and will operate the body as a zombie but it has a standard movement rate, no initiative penalties. It will hide its condition to cause secret cruelties and flee when it might get caught laughing and taunting you to destroy it. An exorcism can purge the spirit
16 Ghost - takes the opportunity to get a corpse for some worthy mission. May live in a artwork or milestone, crossroads or bridge d4 1=punish the lover who murdered them 2=find the identity of the hooded claw who killed them 3=punish local slavers 4=expose corrupt figure
17 Planar Authority - lesser planar being like a demon, devil, daemon, cherubim, archon or deva comes to take the corpse away for safekeeping in the next life. It explains it has cosmic authority but not the strength to back it up. You can totally kill it which might call more or anger powers of other worlds. Feel free to activate some apocalyptic effect of saving the person  
18 Vampire Spirit - a vampire desires the body as a lover and uses transformations to reach the body to raise it an a lesser vampire thrall. It needs three nights of ungodly forbidden rites of the corpse and some blood exchange. The body has part of the personality but also a mockery of the living and committed thrall of the vampire willing to twist living relationships 
19 Weird Crossing - is this even on the map? a ferryman of the dead will in fact carry the party to a planar destination suited to the person's alignment and conduct. The ferry being is just doing its job ordained by cosmic powers but might for cash or larvae help you
20 Dramarama - Its ok to have most of these happen in one adventure, roll d4 extra times

since occurred to me gnolls and vulture monsters might be good too

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