Monday, 26 March 2018

d100 Bardic Poetry Gigs


d10 Quick Types
1 Colourful foreigners - with the songs of their people
2 Romantics - hipsters with latests musical styles and fashions
3 Harsh lampooners - use slander and gossip
4 Jerk all stars - living the bard dream of sex and grog
5 Folk performers - perform songs of the old days
6 Religious performers - singing songs of praise or of a gods myths
7 Local talent - performers from the community
8 Propagandists - preaching distorted news for a cause
9 Non humans - with the songs of their people
10 Magical beings - creatures of magic in disguise among mortals


d100 Bardic Poetry Gigs
01 Vili Montpellier exotic foreigner plays strings, sings and dances happy songs of his people resisting ogre occupation and the joys of not being eaten
02 Zager Grorknarf from the continent in the warring lands sings of battles of cannons and the the doom of knighthhood, disturbing news for most nations 
03 Lars Treefell sings songs of the sea, raiding and pillaging the north frozen coast on the ice sea. Lots of bloody stories of pillaging and his savage gods
04 Tien Lee a singer with a strange harp in a box from a far off land sings about life in the court of the Immortal Lotus Emperor and the sweet dreams of intoxication
05 Korag Laarg barbarian bard sings drinking and fighting songs of manliness and killing your enemies and enslaving the survivors and of having hundreds of captive wives
06 Oola Sunspear sings of lonely desert ruins of fallen kingdoms and the wondrous city states of her distant wasteland home. Plays a stringed instrument with a bow and does scimitar tricks and dances in a revealing costume. She is a trained assasin
07 Fahir Lazan sings of exotic treasures and the city of brass where the efreeti dwell and other wonders of the flaming south lands beyond humans
08 Ling Tsung a elderly woman over a hundred who sings the melancholic longing for her home the kingdom of madness in the frozen north and her strange alien seeping gods
09 Khola Gnorsung a yak herding throat singer of the great wastelands, sings of his great Khans wealth and mass murders of traitors and those refusing to surrender. Has some magical ability as he is considered a holy singer back home
10 Natalia Serunduin comes from the great frozen kingdoms and sings of all the horrors of the long night while smiling sweetly. She plays a lute and a flute and has a pet intelligent  winter wolf  and arctic fox
11 Kasabin Tinderlock sings the latest drinking songs from university secret societies. He gets the crowds drinking so the landlords like him, he tends to get moved on when a local girl gets pregnant
12 Olvina Desternov sings and dances with her band of geriatric uncles. Mixes old time folky balalaika songs with more modern melody and ribald double meanings popular in the city
13 Kiel Wolfang a handsome youth sings stories of rogues sextual adventures and libertine values. Girls seem to follow him and sing his songs. Ne never performs under a full moon it is bad luck
14 Mia Zorgna sweet dancing gypsy girl with her three scowling brothers playing, she also has a trained goat and monkey that do tricks in her act, and nobody understands her tribal nomad songs that seem happy but are about tribal massacres
15 Bevrart Kolingsburn sings with his three girlfriends. He is always losing one and getting a replacement despite he is getting on. Sings heroic songs of struggle against monsters and songs of forbidden love
16 Yippy Fantang with his trained monkey orchestra sings, juggles, tells jokes and does some conjuring tricks. Most of his songs are about shitting and farting and harassing women
17 Klaus Frost sings songs of the woodcutters with his accordion and gets crowds dancing with his exiting new sound from the ghettos of the city, all his songs are about sweet parental approved love so old people approve of him
18 Mona Beveret sings with her slave men who play strings and flute while she sings and dances and tells of scandalous heists gone wrong in city criminal gangs
19 Tara Bacheraz sings sweet syrupy new sound from the city, old people don't like her but youth go crazy. All her songs are about ignoring old people and finding true love. She is a avid member of a secret love cult
20 Kora Tsancherfel sings jolly drinking songs about fat old men finding young love which her audience of fat sleazy old men in horned hats love, she occasionally does duets with some of them and some accompany her with instruments
21 Urtz Slimetoungue sings nasty songs about rulers and officials corruption and sexual depravity. There are several hitmen after him. He plays the lute and has a pet black cat
22 Bala Sientas plays the accordion and sings songs about impotent men who couldn't satisfy her and funny stories about orgies. She is getting on a bit and some say she is really a dude. She always takes some guy home after shows
23 Carlos Driatz plays lute and sings of sexual oddities of noble women. Several of their lovers are trying to kill him 
24 Estaban Vansanches is a moustached lute player who sings funny songs about kings dying on the toilet and their sexual failures. He has had to flee several continents.
25 Villaz Destroyah sings of giant monsters and demon gods but mocks them and makes them seem childish buffoons. Several infernal cults hate him
26 Gloria Gelan sings of intrigues in court and always makes secret police and spies look incompetent. Of course she is a spy and tries to elicit treasonous statements she reports
27 Urzen Trast a big fat man with two skinny slaves who play while he sings. All his songs are about feast and drunken foolishness of the rich
28 Minda Terezen plays the lute and tells scandals and gossip about the city rich. She has a good business on the side blackmailing people and changing names in her stories for a fee
29 Galorien The Rymer a feared and respected bard who all fear for his curses and threats he has made to nobles. Now nobody challenges him and his audiences are quiet and well behaved. Some say he can curse a mans destiny and that he is divine
30 Calambriana Foxglove sings about all the foolish things mighty men do for love. She sings and dances while her young boy band play. She also occasionally commits robberies or gets rich men drunk or drugs them and robs them
31 Varadaz Malamar sings about all the virgins he has defiled and how big his cock is. He scratches himself quite a bit and has contracted some sexualy transmitted mutations
32 Polly Peckingham sings about her failed lovers and her lovely breasts. She auctions herself off after shows with a high price. Her huge manservant protects her from harm and is always a few yards away
33 Gent Tanner is a egoistic swashbuckling bard who sings about his sexual adventures and escapes and how brave and clever he is. He has girls screaming for his good looks
34 Valos Vejas sings about how all the other bards are hopeless failures and how much better he is, he copies their styles to parody them the outdoes them. Other bards hate him
35 Sienna Umber sings and writhes on stage about her sexual prowess while her band plays. She often loses stockings and and items of clothing and boasts about all the perverts who pursue her and rich men she has turned down
36 Varagas Braggado a huge man sings operatic folk songs about all his lovers and enemies he has killed and many many implausible lies of his adventures. He casts a few spells as pert of his show and has assistants with wooden props to illustrate his adventures
37 Calaros Trumpstien sings about how awesome he is while showing his bare hairy chest
38 Erica Voldnaver sings about how much better this place is than some other rival place. She amends thes songs every place she visits but is very popular 
39 Barron Klauhammer tells of his long life and saucy adventures and money he scammed from victims. He also praises the various gods who aided him and keep him untouchable
40 Magna Torentia sings all about her wonder body and the joys of making love and how she is the best ever. Her audiences get very wild and exited and local prostitutes hang around her shows and pay her a cut
41 Misha Zarton sings funny stories of incompetent villagers in a traditional style with a acordian
42 Bellos Caravia sings of the good old days and how farmers are the best people and the soul and lifeblood of the land. He is popular in countryside workers sing his latest songs
43 Bareena Baliala sings traditional songs about dealing with supernatural races of the wilderness and various creatures. She has actually helped some mobs catch and kill monsters 
44 Marnister Zarmenzov sings about the good life of country living and young love. Old and young enjoy her joyful recitals
45 Gila and Vana Kolebcha are bard siblings who sing sweet songs of the seasons and the chores of the common folk. The country folk love them but so di city rich who fing them quaint and nostalgic
46 Kula Marnivar sings of the old days when men and trolls and dwarves were friends. She supports tho old cults that left them offerings in the countryside 
47 Horda Gormenstaff sings about hard work in the fields and mines and returning to your loving family for food and love, lots of jobs in mining and loggers camps 
48 Mazinga Kalett sings about the underground races and monsters that live under foot. He spent years as a slave their and knows many underland folk songs
49 Torrest Vargyana sings about the faerie folk and stories of those taken as slaves or lovers to elfland
50 Proika Vanderland sings happy songs about funny farm animals. He is popular with all ages and does animal impersonations and pretends to talk to animals people bring to his shows claiming to speak the animals fondest desires
51 Ilgyan Istigor sings of the suffering of life and only service to the gods is worthwhile

52 Bantran Vligor sings soulful songs from when humans were enslaved by monsters and songs of the gods kept them with hope
53 Stigyana Potenslaw sings of the bounty from the gods and how all should be grateful
54 Vindas Knobb sings about funny stories of the gods drunken and disgraceful moments which some find outrageous. He has a funny laugh he repeats every sordid gag
55 Vinigas Steel sings about how the gods made the world and how the races were born often mentioning lineages of local rulers who descend from the gods. The local nobility are some of his best customers 
56 Felora Kzin sings of the traps of hell and funny stories of fools being tricked by devils and holy men who tricked the devils back
57 Abram Trisock sings about the first tribes of man and how they resisted the monster empire and eventually over threw it
58 Shlots Rammen sings sweet songs of love for gods and he is often employed as a singer by churches and for funerals. He is a eunuch and still seeks revenge of his former master
59 Brother Solace and his small choir sing stirring songs of praise for the gods and are used for many events and functions like weddings
60 Kelmina Vostergang sings about the gods of vengeance and tails of wicked and the suffering they deserve from the will of the gods, she often implies local officials in her stories but never directly
61 Gimri and His Magic Goat, sings a few shepherd songs and pretends to talk to his goat, funny rustic humour
62 Hora Tanan sings folk songs and dances, she is very voluptuous and old men seem to like her naivete. Her songs are about various wild maidens and feminine petty gods
63 Ilya Kopov sings miserable songs from prison and slave mines he was kept in on the frozen wastes of his homeland
64 Nampazza Kulior and her children sing about happy work in the fields and on the land
65 Brother Bolivar sings lewd stories about monks and priests traditional to the area
66 Vinga Tranmar and her troop of folk dancers sing or rustic festivals and mild flirting
67 Ptask Mnebsiol with his accordion sings hearty stories of ghetto life mob killings from the city in a country folk style
68 Verda Krinkle sings rousing songs about determination with great humour and various funny voices in every day village life
69 Kvarga Jans and her country women's choir sing sad songs about being oppressed by foreigners and cruel despots and losing your children
70 Juldar Borsk and him signing men, sing drinking songs and perform some complex acrobatic dances. most are about being a free mans and drinking and whoring and the perils of marraige
71 Mili Vould sings about the injustice of taxes and incompetent rulership of nobility, he is watched by spies and has links to the peasant revolt

72 Konrad Rakeman sings about hoe foreigners are ruining everything if only men had the courage to burns down their houses and kill them all
73 Tanya Siborsk sings of how big religion has failed and local cults are much better, she is a member of dozens of cults from her touring
74 Bili Glagg sings of the plight of the poor and how there are more of them than the rich and they should arise and eat the rich, being watched by secret police
75 Ingman Vardan sings about how slavery is wrong and keeps the poor man poorer, he has a strong following and his songs are being popular on the streets
76 Sorya Blitask sings songs blaming fatcat landlords and funny songs how they get cruelly killed by angry tennants
77 Trollya Gaborja sings about how the rulers of the land are corrupt and amoral and the gods are on the commoners sides, clergy spies are watching him for heresy 
78 Geldon Trax sings about how the gods have no power and are just immortal sky wizards who were once human. A holy mob has been meeting about what to do to him soon
79 Pildar Tharqz sings about how we live in the best of all places and how good and kind the rulers are. He is a secret police agent charged with getting the mob to hate certain common leaders
80 Vordanya Kuel a lovely maiden who sings stories of the rulers heroic exploits and magical adventures. She seems well off and popular with supporters of the state
81 Knordferdt Juntzenkramer gnomish bard who sings about various gnome tribes and their flaws never mentioning his own lot. He can perform for lowbrow or highbrow audiences and is consulted as a sage on other demi humans and dungeons
82 Garun Thundersong is a dwarf bard who sings of killing goblins and orcs and giants and cunning dwarf heroes and dwarf dungeons being destroyed bt enemies
83 Elorain Oolondarin a elf bard who sings songs lasting hours in elvish which most don't understand but they think sounds nice. Most of the songs are about elves relation to divinities and the sorrow of the broken world of today and how humans and orcs ruined it
84 Valorpion Strange a part devil bard who sings of corruption and vice and how you ought to learn to live with it and enjoy the benefits for yourself
85 Elderban Honeyshrub is a wild halfling maid who sings of jolly feasts and cunning heroes outsmarting big folk like giants
86 Kraag Bumblegrot is a goatman bard who sings of the lord of the woods and his drunken entourage
87 Alsa Gloon a she orc who sings stirring war ballads and songs about massacres and burning cities. Be beats up anyone who heckles her
88 Orlok Sarasna a dark elf singer who tells of the terrible creepy dooms await mortals on the edge of the dark forest which people seem to enjoy
89 Glideon Flax a satyr who plays the pan pipes. He is popular and audiences drink and dance but sometimes the audience start getting naked and goats hang around the venue
90 Glindor Arazin a reptilian bard woman who sings of the slumbering serpent kings and when dinosaurs ruled the world
91 Uranos Tule a doppelganger bard who is happy to eat anyone who requests a private get together with him, sings of dungeons deep, treachery and evil murder hobos
92 Merlan Talanta a mermaid changeling from the sea who sings of the undersea courts of the dragon kings and the various warring empires of the deep
93 Vartuga Ravan is a infamous harp player who sings of the unjust fall of the demon kings who once ruled the earth and how everything is inferior today. He is of course one of the fallen demon kings and will tell of his sad losses of his children and lovers and friends

94 Gundra Palzan is a deva from paradise who visits the world to find heroes she can nudge onto glorious deeds. She sings of ancient battles against evil and the dungeon ruins remaining from that age
95 Vercia Mandragor is a foxwoman who uses her shows and courtly songs to find suitable lovers to ruin their lives. She robs them and destroys their clans for crimes against fox kind
96 Killara Vanthorn is a unicorn who changes into human form and plays for humans songs about loving nature, purity and fighting evil
97 Kitran Skelerzar a dragon in human form looking for opportunities for the future dragon war she knows is coming. Occasionally she will get distracted by treasure hunts and will help guide adventurers to recover lost wealth
98 Vinley Katora is a treeman changeling who sings slow songs naming the trees for thousands of years which humans don't understand but find melancholic. The landlord finds less fights when this bard is performing
99 Gloriana Goldenhorn a shapeshifting dragon come to study humans and find if any worthy heroes need and budges to fight evil. Thinks kindly of humans and likes their company
100 Ourobos King is a basilisk lord how in human form is a poisonous bard who spreads dicent and unrest with his songs with confusing morality that questions the church and state. If he is bothered he will transform into his true shape and kill everyone

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