Wednesday, 27 June 2018

d100 Things my Master did to me at Clerical School

d100 Things my Master did to me at Clerical School

01 Bathed and scrubbed you daily for being a filthy beast
02 Had to sing in choir and was harassed by church elders
03 Made to collect money for the poor in ghettos and slums
04 Was a servant for a horrible elderly priest who needed boils lanced daily
05 Kept in strict religious school with beatings, humiliation and other petty cruelty
06 Care for a holy animal used in rituals and kept from contamination
07 Copied holy books verbatim for years in a church sweatshop
08 Master would beat you for your own good when you made mistakes
09 Had to wash and prepare corpses of the dead for church burials
10 Had to look after the sick in a leper colony or plague hospital
11 Helped master adjudicate church court cases over heretics and witches
12 Helped manage a library of forbidden books but not allowed to ever read them
13 Examined new published works to see if the church should ban them
14 Managed and maintained artworks and relics in a church
15 Compiled lists of missing relics and saint body parts in church records
16 Taught students and new initiates to the faithful
17 Charity mission work helping the poor and needy
18 Visited prisons to convert inmates and comfort the faithful
19 Worked in a sweatshop making holy symbols and trinkets for the faithful
20 Visited the rich seeking money for charitable causes
21 Appointed to comfort and guide a noble youth in the right way to live in the city 
22 Appointed to guard the chastity of young students kept in your care
23 Sent to backwoods village where locals were witches and cultists out to kill you
24 Sent in ghetto of city looking for unclean marks and signs of chaos cults
25 Guarded a holy relic that evil constantly assaulted
26 Joined crusaders in holy war against a rival faith in far off country
27 Worked on a mission to help ex slaves assimilate to society
28 Worked on a mission catching street urchins and educating them in trades
29 Worked for senior church leaders debating which non humans had souls
30 Led a choir of students at a great temple and had to keep them safe
31 Managed a city orphanage and had to protect charges and prevent them from vice
32 Had to maintain a shrine in isolated miserable evil infested region
33 Sent to preach in worst parts of city constantly harassed by criminals and perverts
34 Helped lead mobs of zealots to beat up sinners and degenerates in streets
35 Led moral campaign against degenerate writers and artists unknowingly  
36 Worked in soup kitchen for the poor in a big squalid city
37 Helped plague refugees find treatment, families and accommodation in a big city
38 Organised charity events and performances with awful rich people
39 Worked with city officials on committee to improve sewerage treatment works
40 Helped build a huge temple complex working with architect 
41 Slaved building tiny churches in frontier areas with local workers 
42 Sent to live with silent hermits for years where nobody spoke exposed to elements
43 Sent to advise crusaders sent on mission to foreign land to preach word of faith
44 Sent to exotic foreign land to survey religious practises of heathens
45 Sent on mission to find relics beyond the frontier and were the only survivor
46 Sent on ship and spent years lost on various islands before return home
47 Sent to assist inquisitors hunting werewolves in the frontier regions
48 Examined reports for inquisitors of witches, heretics and demonic cults
49 Managed temple wine cellar for use in rituals and events
50 Aided senior bishops in the privy in hierophants palace
51 Blacked out offence text in new publications for church literary committee

52 Gatekeeper for a celebrate order 
53 Taught at a religious school for privileged brats
54 Served as assistant to exorcist until a demon killed them
55 Worked as curator of church collection of evil relics and books
56 Worked in graveyard supervising rituals and keeping undead out
57 Supervised cleaning cathedral roofing and windows and statues
58 Sent on mission to convert a island cannibal clan for several years
59 Appointed to petty knights household as teacher and adviser 
60 Served as book keeper of church tithes and investments for church treasury
61 Served as a personal scribe of senior church official
62 Sent into ancient church catacombs to copy ancient headstones
63 Sent to wasteland to deface ancient cult engravings with holy symbols
64 Sent to frontier to supervise burning captured
65 Sent to creepy coastal town full of heretics, cultists and criminals
66 Imprisoned in church dungeon due to misunderstanding with inqisition
67 Sent to evaluate hauntings to see if church authorities need to act
68 Assisted magistrate
 as court clerk for petty peasant legal conflicts
69 Looked after mad house in isolated area with limited resources and staff
70 Investigated church corruption but sabotaged constantly by criminal enemies
71 Helped cover up church scandals for investigative comitee

72 Sent to faraway penal colony to serve devoted among criminals
73 Spent years on isolated mountain temple hidden from the world
74 Spent years in a holy cave shrine meditating among the snakes and rats
75 Served in court of corrupt nobility who sent killers after you many times
76 Translated ancient church books into modern language for great temple
77 Supervised construction of a monument and rewarded for finishing early
78 Caught up in church politics, sent to frontier as punishment for choosing wrong side
79 Served on mission to secretly aid bastards of rich nobles and church hierarchy
80 Served as adviser to a royal heir until they became angered by you
81 Served in a country shrine mostly blessing farm animals and performing weddings
82 Worked in great mausoleum with others repairing stonework and maintaining blessings
83 Captured by monsters as sole survivor of mission but converted them over years
84 Served a corrupt petty noble who imprisoned you for years in secret cell
85 Served a divination temple cataloging predictions for future generations
86 Investigated missing bodies in graveyards stolen by necromancers, ghouls and cults
87 Served in isolated garrison on frontier for several dangerous years
88 Looked after shrine in a gold rush shanty town with miners and murder hobos
89 Managed a patrol gathering found dead bodies in city to be taken to burial pit
90 Sent to convert frontier tribe and spent years in constant peril of being eaten
91 Sent to aid front line troops in a horrible war against evil hordes
92 Worked for inquisition recording confessions of captured cultists and chaos priests

93 For good work uncovering church corruption you were sent to tiny island colony for years
94 Spent years working in the bureaucracy of the church chasing paperwork
95 You had job of checking religious art up to church specifications

96 Sent in disguise to various noble courts to route out cults and heretics
97 Sent to document ruins that had signs of evil cults that needed the church to act
98 Sat on interfaith committee in city to resolve disputes and share wisdom on evil sects
99 Worked on school campus as tutor for new clerical acolytes and marking papers
100 Worked in a golem lab making magical statues to defend temples under a high priest

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