Saturday 14 December 2013

d100 Magic Dungeon Pies

Magic pies are mostly found on strange fair days or when fairy world closer, or in empty rooms somewhere in the dungeon dimension or left by trickster baking gods. May come in box of d12 remaining. Usual a hand size snack type pie but others possible.

In the dungeon dimension pies appear on plinths in rooms, in chests or rooms which always have a magic pie in them. Sometimes the pie resembles a favorite one character had as a child making them all sentimental. Pies can be bad but some are good enough that even those who have had a bad experience are tempted. A evil self aware dungeon might contrive to destroy your supplies before finding one of these.

d12 signs it is a magic pie

1 Says its magic on box, or plate or with pastry letters on top
2 Candle on top never goes out
3 Pie remains fresh and warm and vermin free until eaten
4 Glowing magic rune or sigil or glyph or demon mark on top
5 Save on sight or eat immediate, multiple victims will fight for pie
6 Hear evil laughter and thunderclap when eaten
7 Pie quivers in anticipation of being eaten
8 When box opened hear angelic choir sing a note designating pies as awesome
9 Invites you to eat it with magical mouth on crust
10 Pie keeps teleporting in front of you 1d6 times if ignored
11 Magical sparkles glimmer around it occasionaly
12 Glowing throbbing breathing pie stops if spotted, seems normal if checked closer (roll again)

d100 Magic Dungeon Pies

01 Turns eater into stack of scattering blackbirds
02 Turns eater into magical talking toad
03 Sleep d100 years
04 Fireball explodes if crust penetrated
05 Giant centipede jumps into your face and bite it
06 After eating vomit up a swarm of live rats or bats or bugs that attack you
07 Turn into a living buzzing insect hive colony being
08 Turn into an orc
09 Turn into a troll
10 Change alignment one step
11 +1 STR
12 +1 CON
13 +1 DEX
14 +1 CHA
15 Cure disease
16 Delicious but infects with awful disease or parasites
17 Fruit pie save or a fruit tree grows inside you to full size
18 Poison pie tastes delicious and very tempting
19 Stone pie turns eater to stone
20 Cure poison
21 +1 Move
22 Polymorphic pie can make eater change to any normal living being once
23 Change gender
24 Dinosaur pie infects with presence of the primordial dino devil
25 Flame breath 3d6 for a turn after eating all
26 Purge possessed spirits if eaten
27 If you get close elder spawn horror jumps out and impregnates them by face hugging
28 Person bursts into flames then is reincarnated from ashes
29 Pie eater is possessed by a spirit from something in pie
30 Able to see into spirit world for a day
31 Prophetic dreams from the gods
32 Turn into magic pie just like this one
33 If opened or bitten a demon bird soars out then tries to kill everyone
34 An imp jumps out and yells: "surprise!". Turns invisible and torments the eater
35 Never need to eat again as pie keeps slowly growing inside guts
36 Before can be sampled a decomposing arm bursts out and tries to choke or crush anyone
37 As go to bite kitten cries heard, inside are  a d6 healthy kittens
38 Eat it and turn into a pig
39 Grow 6 inches taller
40 Skin changes to bright colour not normally found in humans
41 Pie full of semiprecious gems
42 Eater becomes exceedingly delicious to taste
43 Snake in a pie!, venomous angry snake bursts out if bitten or cut
44 Full of platinum coins in delicious gravy
45 Can detect treasure for 1d4 hours
46 Demonic parasites explode from your intestines CON save, die or injured if live
47 Gain night vision permanently
48 Ticks, mosquitoes, flies, leeches, fleas, any parasites think you taste foul (even giant ones)
49 You give birth to lovely child clone of yourself the next day
50 Have the ability to lay one egg a day
51 Age 1/5th normal speed from now on
52 Magically slow and do everything at half speed for 1d4 days
53 Magically fastand do everything at double speed for 1d4 days
54 Can tell bad magic pies from good ones (Y or N only)
55 Develop bat like sonar from this magic bat pie
56 Develop ability to hold breathe CON rounds with this magic frog pie
57 Ability to speak to rats with this magic rat pie
58 Can vomit up a stinking cloud in a 30 foot cone once a day
59 Skin glows in the dark
60 Can summon 4 more magic pies all of different types once like a one use spell
61  Pie complains and sprouts eyes and arms and legs, is now your familiar
62 Goes into trance and can speak to one dead person for a while
63 Can vomit up delicious gravy at will, makes anything taste great to non vegetarians
64 Gain 1d6 x10 pounds weight, can lose as normal over a few months
65 Pie ghost appears and abuses you for 1d4 days criticizing everything you do
66 Every bite is a different flavour and delicious, first half savoury, second half desert
67 May only eat food if in a pie pastry crust
68 Pie makes you aware on first taste is explosive, 5d6 damage in 10 foot radius circle if thrown
69 Pie makes you aware on first taste is deadly acidic cream, d4 damage for a 2d6 rounds
70 Pie makes you aware on first taste is explosive web pie like a web spell
71 Elemental critter bursts out begging for mercy, your new intelligent magic pet
72 Gives you a vision of your one true love somewhere in world
73 Anything bites you makes a CON save vs poison or will not bite you again
74 When pie crust broken a splendid table cloth, serving vessels and magnificent feast unfurl
75 Temporarily may commune with mysterious spirit of the dungeon briefly, toys with mortals
76 Detect traps for 1d4 hours
77 Take no fall damage, always land on feet
78 May turn Undead once as a 10th level priest after eating when needed
79 Commune with spirits of animals in pie, WIS save or become vegetarian
80 Hair grows down to feet, coloured exotically
81 Clothes or armour turns into fabulous robes fit for a king
82 Can cast a first level arcane spell once per day
83 Can cast a first level nature spell once per day
84 Can cast a first level divine spell once per day
85 Can cast a first level mentalist spell once per day
86 Skin turns metallic (gold, silver, bronze, iron) +1 AC
87 Your teeth are constantly replaced by shiny new ones like a shark
88 A magical worm in your stomach protects you from all food poisoning or digestive tract parasites
89 Turn into undead being
90 Turn into an elf
91 Turn into a dwarf
92 Turn into a beastman
93 Turn into a halfling
94 Turn into a fish
95 Turn into newt
96 Turn into a sheep
97 Return to youth age restored to 3d6 years
98 Do not age anymore
99 Require +1 weapons to harm you
100 Raises you one level instantly

Perhaps a villain could dare you to eat pies in a deadly contest


  1. Great idea. I don't think I'd take a bite of dungeon pie however.

    1. cmon d100 with immortality up for grabs!

    2. As much as i'd enjoy a worm in my stomach protecting me from all poisons i just wouldn't want risk being turned into a halfling ;-)

    3. had a barbarian reincarnate as a gnome and decided life span better and didnt try to die like when he was briefly a kobold

  2. It is like the deck of many things. You know you shouldn't but you just can't resist. You hope for immortality and instead you turn into a newt.

    Can you imagine a PC rolling 99 and getting protection from normal weapons? That would be insane.

  3. i remember those wacky magic pond tables in modules - could be like them


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