Porc N Orc Talk inspired by Dyvers

Some old and new stuff on Orcs after i realized mine might be a good mix of oldschool and gonzo 80s Brit fantasy gaming style cliches, plus some other stuff

Orc?
Generally shorthand for a horrendous savage brute good at killing
You can generally feel not so bad about killing and robbing orcs
They are not a proper race even right? 
I mean wizards can make them (a 3rd lv spell with variations)

I have lots of orcs of different tribal types and I generally make them a variants of my BX beast-man class (barbarian is another variant). Players like to know difference and find some tribes ok. A player recently married several orcs then became one over about five level play time. He now has a nice dungeon but seeks life extension powers. Orcs make up 20-40% of the human population in my setting. The campaign is based around a horrible LE city full of pirates and rumoured to be ruled by the Devil. The city has orcs do most military duties and orc nobles are respected.

However they are brutal thugs even the civilized polite ones. They can be honorable but are anathema to humans in many ways. They eat disgusting things and are feared in war as killer brutes. New orc tribes boil up from the deep or a wizards spawning pits every decade.

They are mostly worshipers of devils or the dead or spirits of war. Many orcs are even non believers in worship as no god ever really helped them. Other orc variants serve demons or chaos or elder daemons. A great orc earth goddess mother draws power from the earth and spirit world she uses orcs as defenders of the wild ways. They don't even hate elves and have been seen with them hunting humans. Orcs sacrifice blood and bless blood not holy water. Their gods prefer murder for food and like hoards of gold.

Only Traditional Orcs, the Barron of Shadelport and his licensed representatives may legally make orcs. Orc kind had no females for early existence until orcs of different tribes learned to make females by different means or heroes wished for females from the gods. More recent orcs learned to wish for better spells to make females instead of a few wives. Eventually Orc heroes learned they could marry minor earth goddesses and this type became quite fecund. Being more nature worshipers with druidic rather than clerical powers for the rare elite magic orcs. Many older orcs take up magic late in life (change class to priest or druid or sorcerer or wizard). Others will seek the more skilled professions as a thief or warrior or some other class. Orc monks?

So orcs start as beastman then continues going for d12 HD per level and other advances as a beastman but can change class at some point to specialize and become professional i the human world. Ive been describing my beastman class as abhuman more because it has come to include more weirder things like rock men or tree men or other non beast based races like on Planet Mongo. Also orcs can interbreed with beastmen like the swine headed orcs plague years ago. This can create many interesting orc beast hybrids and allows for more decent breeds of beastmen by contrast. Orc breed with goblinoids too and many think they are a sub form of goblinoid as hybrids so common in some places.

What would orc bards be like? Orcs are very vocal and like drums, chanting, horns, screaming and swearing. Humans find it rattling and unnerving. Orcs are impatient and many stupid ones have tantrums and do stupid things. They are jealous of all other races and can be spiteful. They are very loyal and obedient servants. If orcs feel mistreated they will look for weaknesses and opportunities against the leaders. They are all highly political which helps them avoid killing each other (other races or tribes need not apply for this benefit).

Orc style food is one of the top ten preferred eating styles of Shadelport Many humans have learned to live off it or feed to their kids "no6 Orcish style is cheap, healthy, flavorsome: olives, bugs, rodents, chilli, potatoes, eggplants, mushrooms, worms, radishes". They like things to be dark coloured and oily. Char grilled is a prefered cooking style but boiling and frying and earth ovens are a favourite. Orc like to spitroast their victims. Many dishes salted or pickled in vinegar which can make more palpable for humans. Chaotic orcs are riddled with disease and parasites but lawful ones are disciplined and have better good hygiene and surgery.

Orc tribes of the underland
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2014/11/underland-5-orc-tribes-of-underland.htmlHumanoid sub breeds hre too on this broken boss monster class table set
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2013/04/races-from-beyond-black-stump.html
Old races including orcs
http://elfmaidsandoctopi.blogspot.com.au/2014/05/helter-skelter-in-dungeon-dungeon-race.html

Goblins, hobgoblins, dryads, elves, hobbits, gnomes, trolls, ogres, changelings, beast men lived in a golden age when beasts and plants ruled the world before humans. Orcs like humans were born at the end of this age. Elves invented spells to make orcs as a way to use their own dead in desperate times. The came to regret this when evil ones learned how to do the same. Many later traditions did diferent things. The first Orc were sexless but later versions created all orcs as males. These orcs were created to out breed and fight their enemies. Modern orcs have used many secret tricks and means to create female orcs. With many tribes having gender equality in numbers, their are still many with no females in wilds using old spells. Natural reproduction is the most common means of breeding today by advanced tribes. Wizards will create orcs singly or en-mass still. Most created orcs feel some sense of obligation to their creators. Creators must be wary to dominate and train the orc quickly or they may turn on their creators. 

Also some orcs created gender changing spells to give their sub breeds females or mistreat prisoners. Supposedly is a spell to make orcs into humans.

1d10 Where do these orcs get females for tribal reproduction
1 Steal women from any other species and possibly turn to orcs with magic
2 Some voluntarily change sex with magic and are considered very heroic
3 Allied tribe with earth godesses who provides plenty of females
4 Some become functional hermaphrodites who can father their own children
5 Shaman or priest or sorcerer uses spells to reproduce tribe
6 Kidnap children of others to raise as own and use spell to change worthy ones
7 Leader must journey to gods home every generation to ensure gods provide females
8 Single orc queen lays lots of eggs sacs, one each day if fed enough
9 Leaders obtain a few females mostly for selves by trade and use magic to make orcs
10 Female tribe with little interest in fathers, raise children collectively

Some orc tribe females are indistinguishable and equal, they birth a single young
Others females have large hips, buttocks and breasts delivering multiple babies at a time
Some have multiple nipples like a sow and have litters of babies

A orc baby will survive newborn eating bugs, birds, mice and eventually finding a tribe.

Create Orc 3rd level Spell
Ritual takes 1 hour once materials ready
Material Components variable but include ritual use of relics from the dawn age, gestures, incense and some musicians with drums and gongs and chime and chants

Many variants of this spell but most turn a single corpse into a cocoon like sack that later splits when a fully formed orc bursts out. Each spell has a set form and colour that spell creates. Orcs all are inborn with sneak, hide, climb and learn the first weapons they are given rapidly.

d10 Spell type
1 Dead Elf to Orc spell as first used by elves creates a into a sexless orc 
2 Dead Human to Orc spell makes dead humans into a sexless orc 
3 Human to Orc spell turns a living voluntary (torture ok) human into a sexless orc 
4 Flesh to Orc spell allows maker to stitch up any meat to form a sexless creature
5 Blood to Orc spell mixes blood from a body with clay to make sexless orc 
6 Corpse Orc spell grinds up mummified bodies and form into sexless orc
7 Alchemical Orc spell uses 2000gp distillery and 100gp gold in chemicals into a M or F orc
8 Baby to Orc spell uses a human baby under 1 year into a grown a M or F orc
9 Clay Orc spell requires a life size figure of their sterile dream orc then animate, pottery skill helps
10 Bog to Orc the most recent spell allows you to form a male orc from natural swampy muck

Create Orcs 7rd level Spell
As above but makes one orc per level, more materials needed obviously